Apparently I am of dubious character...

Man, what is wrong with me? I joined a sorority in college, drained my dad's bank account, got shitty grades while seriously fucking up my credit, had to live with my mom for a year while going to school locally so that I could get back into the University I left and didn't hear from any of "my sisters" in the sorority once I left. When I came back to school, I didn't want to have anything to do with them--not just because I realized that I didn't have any true friends in there (with the notable exception of a few, but they left the sorority too... how interesting) but because I realized I didn't need that kind of pressure in my life. I hated feeling like I was always trying to catch up to everyone else and that I had to go along to get along. I'm a very independent person... I hated feeling left out if I wasn't doing what everyone else was all the time. It turns out that I'm an alumni. Some how I fell through the cracks and they didn't make me "officially" quit, but everyone knows I did. Of course, since I'm listed as an alumni, I'm using that to whatever advantage I can. I put it on my resume, for example. Anything for a foot in the door, right?

So. There's all that. And then I joined My Space. And I put in a request to join the sorority's group. I did that before I checked the comments and found that there is an alumni on the advisory board of the chapter that I used to belong to who lives in my town and wants to meet other "sisters". If she finds a way to contact me, I'm going to basically tell her to fuck off (much nicer than that.) But what does that say about me? Why did I join that group? Just to have it on my profile? Wow, I'm pretty superficial.

I really hate it when I make extremely unflattering realizations about myself.

Paradigm of Productivity:

1. Stay up until 5am talking to your boyfriend about past relationships; feel icky at first, then grow closer through the process.
2. Sleep until 9am, then watch episodes of Charmed and ER on TNT until boyfriend gets up.
3. Eat bowl of Frosted Mini Wheats while watching TV.
4. Boyfriend gets up, boyfriend goes back to sleep, make egg sandwich while finishing ER.
5. Boyfriend wakes up, take out dog, throw ball, eat yogurt while watching beginning of CSI marathon on Spike TV.
6. Continue on couch watching CSI until boyfriend leaves to pick up roommate stranded at Pep Boys.
7. Fall back to sleep.
8. Wake up when boyfriend returns with roommate, take out dog, throw ball, come in and watch TV with boyfriend and pot-smoking roommate.
9. Take shots of Makers Mark out of 50ml bottle with boyfriend while watching Napoleon Dynamite (in which roommate was part of cast.)
10. Eat 1 piece each of 2 pizzas that boyfriend and roommate have cooked because they're high. Grab beer and escape to bedroom to play on computer.
11. Continue to watch CSI marathon while searching through fav websites.
12. Consider getting another beer.
13. Try to work up motivation to go to gym for Spinning class or Step/Abs at 5:30.
14. Scrap gym idea, try to work up motivation to get to work.

And here we are. Fourteen bullets, starting at 9am. Man, am I lazy or what? Well, you know, it's a holiday, right? I don't want any crap about how I should be doing something for the community in honor of Dr. King... I'm doing my part for the environment by not driving my car. Bite me.

My teeth have sweaters on them. They probably feel like that because I haven't brushed them yet today. Before you get all grossed out, I've been working on organizing M's dining room/my storage area since 10am, no kidding. Did I mention that he didn't help at all? Well, that's not entirely true... I begged him to help me break down boxes and throw out all the empty beer bottles before his friend came over and he did, a little. But now I'm hiding in his room watching the Rose Bowl because I'm too embarrassed to be out there seeing the mess through fresh eyes. If I wanted the house to be as clean as I'd like it to be, I'd be picking up after these boys every single day and I'm just not going to do that. So the house is worse that disgusting. I'm afraid if the cops showed up for any reason, they would take our dogs and report us to Animal Control or whatever agency rescues pets. I'm only exaggerating a little. It really is that bad. And I can deal with it if it's just our dirty little secret, but when Matt actually invites his friends over and won't clean up, I'm hiding in the room.

Venting is nice, huh? I've been so incredibly unproductive today. I should have been doing so much more work than I got done. I know that because I organized all my crap, it should make me more efficient in the long run, but I have to play catch up tomorrow. And I'm training a new girl... that will be a little awkward: I know I've said that all this is done, but it's really not and don't tell anyone, okay? Yeah. That'll be a great first impression. Oh well. Gotta break them in somehow, right?

I need another beer. I have more crap to vent but I'd rather just forget it and watch Texas beat the crap out of USC (I hope. UGA disppointed me so much I can barely talk about it. I actually had nightmares about the Sugar Bowl.)

I'm out.