1. Scarves with tank tops: Dude. It's summer. I don't care if it makes your outfit. Wear a necklace.
2. Boy Bands: Please learn to play an instrument. That is all.
3. That song by Train: I can't even write it because just the words will get it stuck in my head and then I'll have to stick an icepick in my ear.
4. Celebrity Sex Tapes: Yeah, it's called Porn.
5. Vampires: Okay, I actually like vampire movies but even I am getting sick of having a vampire on every corner. This trend may never die... just like the vampires! Oooooooh....
6. Reality shows: What is with our fascination with watching people lead their semi-normal lives? Please make them go away so I can stop killing brain cells by watching them.
7. Excessive tanning: Gym, Tan, Laundry? Guys, when your skin gets that tough, it's called hide.
8. Articles about bartending in a town full of bars: Because clearly, that's exactly what you want to read about after spending the entire night in a bar and hating yourself in the morning as you do the Walk of Shame through downtown to your car. Reading about how stupid the bartenders think you are is exactly what's going to get you through waiting for the assholes to come take the immobilizer off of your back tire while you're wiping mascara off your cheeks and sweating on a curb in your mini dress and 5 inch heels at 11am on a Sunday morning.